im not done

strawberry poptarts better raw
smell like rubbing alcohol
i was very impatient
shoving head in the freezer
to rasp the scent of ice
on the roof of my mouth
chewing it / choking
i fished it out

i ate baby food until i was a teenager
when i cant / my hands cannot
trapped with a stuck lid
opening the cold window
poisoning for immunity
bit by bit / tripping the cap
burning the top a little

i tried to DO
i wanted to be DONE
but the BIG SOMETHING beats me like laundry
hey, i /
hey, im thinking about becoming a librarian
today i tripped and froze
i still have to chew the back of my hand 
to stop it hurting

slow grudge at the burner
when my hands cannot /
i cannot mark the date the burning stop
or be smaller neither
i love you / i cannot put you down 

today cold / i walk far in it
my body to beat against
a place you could breathe
playing frost to leaves
your words / peaceful
oatmeal
tracheotomy
believe